The Bible made man the head of the family, not for the sake of superiority, but to fulfill a function. In an army, not everyone can be the leader, there needs to be a superior — a chain of command — so that there is order. The chain of command in the family starts with God. The Israelite family was patriarchal. Genealogical lines of families were traced according to the father’s line — not the mother’s line. It’s not because mothers are not held of value. It’s simply because God places the responsibility for the welfare of the family on the father. If the family experiences failure or disgrace, it’s the father’s name that gets mentioned. At the same time, the honor goes to the father because it is his burden to lead his family in the right direction.
If the family experiences failure or disgrace, it’s the father’s name that gets mentioned. At the same time, the honor goes to the father because it is his burden to lead his family in the right direction.
As a Husband
The first responsibility of the man in the family is to take care of his wife. In Ephesians 5:28, husbands are commanded to love their wives as they love their own bodies. A person instinctively protects oneself from danger, injury, hurt, or discomfort, and this must be how a man must be with his wife. He must be willing to lay down his life for his wife, as Christ did for the church. According to the verse below, the husband’s relationship with God would depend on how he is treating his wife.
7 Husbands, in the same way, show consideration for your wives in your life together, paying honor to the woman as the weaker sex, since they too are also heirs of the gracious gift of life—so that nothing may hinder your prayers. (1 Peter 3:7 NRSV)
As a Provider
The second Godly function of the man as the head of the home is to provide for his family. The Apostle Paul wrote to Timothy about how a man must provide for his family, and if he doesn’t do this, he has denied the faith. Inspired by the Holy Spirit, Paul was saying a man who does not provide for his wife and kids is not really a believer. This reference is not about a man who is unable to do so because of circumstances, or has failed, even though he honestly tried. It pertains to a man who refuses to provide for his family in a consistent and responsible manner. He does this by choice.
As a Teacher about God
The main responsibility for teaching the children about the ways of God falls on the father, not the mother.
The main responsibility for teaching the children about the ways of God falls on the father, not the mother. The pathways of righteousness and truths about salvation lies with the father. It is not that the mother does not have any responsibility in this regard. In reality, the father cannot do it alone, but the accountability lies with him. When he meets his Maker in heaven, this would be something he would answer for, which is why the father plays the role of the priest representing the family. Accounts regarding this truth can be read in Genesis 8:20, 12:7–8, 22:2–9, and in Exodus 12. Every now and then, the head of the home had to set up an altar and represent his family before God. Men have to act as pastors and priests to their own families. The spiritual care of the children must not and should not be entirely be left to the church or even to the wife. The commandment says that headship rests with the father.[1]
The brokenness of the man can cause brokenness in the family he is leading.
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