Once a person has grown up and has made their own life, they wear their impregnable armor with pride. They know very well what they will do each day not to make the same mistakes their father made.
However, the impact of their absent father remains. It doesn’t matter if in the present, they have a relationship with him, or if he passed away, or if they act like the past never happened when the family all gets together.
We must understand that the absent father is a man who did not know how to take on his role as a father because he never understood his role as a person in general.
The first thing that needs to be done is “understand.”Let’s understand that the absent father is a man who does not know how to take on his role as a father. Moreover, he never understood his role as a person in general.
It is very possible that he did not have well developed personal abilities, like strong self-esteem, internal balance, acceptance of his mistakes, fears, and own personal shortcomings.
So, does that justify what he did to his child, and the emotional vacancy he left behind? No, but understanding can sometimes help us adjust to reality and avoid withholding more negative emotions.
As an adult, the child knows they have grown and matured with many gaps due to that kind of upbringing and lack of affection. However, there always comes a moment when they should cut ties with the past to heal their present wounds.
Without a father, it is most likely that the person had a more meaningful and healthier bond of attachment with their mother, grandparents, or even friends. They are who stand as their pillars of strength day in and day out.
A father is a person who is there for their child, picks them up, tends to them, and guides them safely through each day, building a path of significant moments in the life of their child.
They are the authentic family, those who are truly important. A father does not just give life. A father is the person who is there for their child, who picks them up, who tends to them, and who guides them safely through each day, building a path of significant moments in the life of their child.
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